Technology Bites

Technology and I have usally always got along.
I've been using the internet since I was 8 (mid 90's), I know phones, and fax's, scanners, photocopiers. You name it,i've used it.. and normally without trouble.
I work in marketing(in house marketing) So I work for a company and we do all the stuff for our sales team and reps out on the road. Its a great job and I love it most of the time.
I've had a few things on the go, some promotional stuff and peices i've put togerther.
I was asked to simply PRINT some of this stuff in bulk and send it to our customer.
Sounds easy right?
WRONG

1- Glossy Paper into the printer, click print.
OH CRAP its double sided and staining.. STOP
2- Paper jam- ahhhhh crap, ink all over my hands because its not yet sealed STOP
3- Re load paper, walk away... 5 minutes later BEEEP BEEP BEEP paper jammed, ink now all over the hands, and inside the print.. OH CRAP printer is hot burnt finger.
4-Re load paper walk away..... come back oh CRAP out of ink.. take out giant ink cartridge which weighs a tonne.. place it on table.
5- Ink cartridge FALLS off table which is about a metre high, directly onto my ankle.. ouch thats gonna hurt.. and it does it bruises...

6- By now.. we are about 3 hours into our printing episode because between all the back and forth.. I havent accomplised really much of anything besides wasting ALOT of paper (cue guilt) and also killing alot of ink(Ink is money people times like this)
7- Several more hours later I finally managed to accomplish half of what I set out to do..
In between abusing the printer to anyone who would listen.. and not getting any help from my boss(who happens to be a fool)

I started today on a more POSITIVE note, I thought i'd give the printer another try.... he was being a bit more friendly today.. really helping me out.
And then.. the photocopier steped up to the plate.. he wouldnt let me do a double sided, sorted, stapled with colour front cover... nope.. several more trees's and a bit of $$$ in ink later.
I quit....

Cue stomach bug which leads me to do alot of thinking while im sitting on the toilet sorry if thats TMI.. But i'm starting to THINK
that the printer.. and the photocopier realised that I needed them... much much more than they needed me.. and thus for decided to become difficult.. and withdraw from me.. leaving me perplexed..

wait I think I'm relating my current technology drama.. with my man drama....
yup I think I am.

In anycase I have sworn off both the Printer and the Photocopier until further notice.. because they BOTH need to get there shit togerther.. I don't wanna get hurt again so I'm just not gonna play their games.
They may hold the cards thinking that I need them, but bitch I can switch you off anytime I want.