Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Dear ***

When my mum died, I was instrusted with looking after my family.
What about me I thought, obviously mum thinks im strong enough to go this alone.
Ha stupid thought.

I believed every little word you told me, hanging on by a thread because I eneded someone like you, to breathe the life back into me. To make me laugh and make my bad days better.

But to be honest with me?
You weren't.
Not always.
Maybe in your eyes you've done no wrong, no harm.
But I can tell you now that is not the case.
You broke me.

Can I have that thank you back?

I gave you a chance to come free, get out of jail free.
No hard feelings.
Just stay friends?

But no you made a choice to stick to your story.
Stupid man.
This is the bit where you protest your innocence and If I wasn't so strong Rod.
Because I HAVE TO BE STRONG. I've never had that choice.
If I was weak, I'd back down.. Take it all back.
But I can't be weak anymore.

If you ask me to prove it, innocent until proven guilty?

I will have no hesitiation in doing so. Keep in mind, your lies and my stupidity have caused me great pain, and many sleepless night.
Pain I don't wish to pass on to anyone else.
This is not a threat.

I am asking one thing of you.
Take your words, lines, calls, and comments.
Direct them at someone else.
Stop shitting where you eat.. Haven't you learned your lesson yet?
Stop shitting on me, and all the trust, love and help I gave you so freely.
I will miss you, I will miss our friendship.
But I wont miss the wondering, the sleepless nights or the guilt.
And the terrible anguish that comes with caring about someone SO fucked up.
So thats it, as long as you leave me.
We'll be fine.

If not.
We'll see.